Day 3, I have always considered myself fairly level headed, but lord almighty even I have had to pause a moment or two to gather my thoughts and regain my composure at various moments during my ever consuming day. Life in general has been for the most part smooth sailing and has always offered an abundance of limitless possibilities, except of course for the isolated bump in the road. I am what you would call an unconventional thinker, a creative doer, not a mindless follower, but it does tend to get tiring a and even cumbersome at times, because the reality of it all is some days you would rather just blend into the crowd rather than stick out like a sore thumb.
These past couple of days has been, let us say, a challenge for me personally. I have come face to face with a few my deepest and darkest fear. In attempts to connect someone special on a more personal and three dimensional realm, it has become necessary to delve into the past. For before we can move forward we must understand where we are and how we got here. So, for the sake of clarity, I have revisited some skeleton that I had previously allowed to lay dormant. I have always held back from being too forthcoming in the initial getting to know you phase of any relationship, but with '"him'", I have had this overwhelming desire to keep no secrets and to uphold honesty at all costs. My past is as much a part of who I am today as are my hopes and dreams for the future.
These past couple of days has been, let us say, a challenge for me personally. I have come face to face with a few my deepest and darkest fear. In attempts to connect someone special on a more personal and three dimensional realm, it has become necessary to delve into the past. For before we can move forward we must understand where we are and how we got here. So, for the sake of clarity, I have revisited some skeleton that I had previously allowed to lay dormant. I have always held back from being too forthcoming in the initial getting to know you phase of any relationship, but with '"him'", I have had this overwhelming desire to keep no secrets and to uphold honesty at all costs. My past is as much a part of who I am today as are my hopes and dreams for the future.
Lost Endnotes: Shedding the layers that has long since shielded and guarded me has been a constant internal battle of sorts. I still struggle to break free from the doubt of openly expressing myself and sharing my feeling for fear of not having my feeling reciprocated. Though I find myself at odds with my ability to vocalise my feelings, I have no doubt of my ability to experience and share love. I am determined to break down these walls around my heart and allow for love to flow freely. I have faith and trust in '"him'" and I believe that we are committed to moving forward and seeing where this path leads us.
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